Here we go.........
Today is my first full day here on the island of Oahu. Last night I went to sleep at 7:30pm (felt fabulous to lay down) and prior to that my travel went smoothly and my paper drivers license worked perfectly to get a rental car. I went to a 7am yoga class at a great local studio called Hot Yoga By the Sea and WHOA did my stiff, tight body need that. I got a ten class package in order to be able to go two times a day while I am here. I stuffed my big backpack in a duffle for the travel on the plane (it was a checked bag) since I has all the straps, I thought I needed a little wisdom from youtube on how to ship it and of course YouTube always provides the help and support I need to learn anything about anything in life. The duffel was a great idea and is easy to compact back into the pack.
The place I am staying I found on www.vrbo.com which stand for vacation rental by owner and I have used this website way before air b&b was ever created. It is a perfect little one bedroom studio that would do well even for two people but I am really happy to have the space to sprawl out and I even have my own bathroom. Can you say LUXARY!! It is a 5 min walk from Kailua beach and a 5 min walk to coffee shops, whole foods, grocery, etc. The price was only $67 a night and they have washer and dryer there I can use for a small fee so I can wash all of my clothes before heading to the big island next week. The rental can be viewed by googling Nice Vacation Rental Kailua Hawaii. (I think) It was the cheapest for the best location in this area.
I can honestly say that I am having a little difficulty realizing that I don’t need to be in a rush to do anything, I don’t owe anyone anything, I don’t have a test coming up in the future that I have to be concerned about. All of this is surreal to me, I have set up my life to not have things to WORRY about. This is SO un-normal of me. All of my life I have had a to-do list a mile long, not only of work accomplishments that I was working on, or a schedule of things coming up that I was committed to, but also personal goals of achievement used to fill up my to-do list as well. The first three years I wasn’t on a ship back in 2007, I filled my life with becoming a good surfer, doing Ironman and many other triathlons, as well as becoming higher ranking in my career by doing lots of crap I was supposed to do in order to achieve that. I am not saying I regret any of that - I actually am stoked I did that stuff, however, I am just expressing that I am new at the feeling of not STRIVING for the next thing. This is not however a thing for everyone, but it definitely had become a habit of mine and to be honest with you, I was always searching for love/admiration/respect from others in order to feel better about my life. At the time, I didn’t know back in those years that I really didn’t even like myself. On the outside, you would have thought I was so in love with myself. I did love what my life consisted of, the people, the places, and experiences, however, nothing outside of us can make us like ourselves. This is the work I am continuing to understand and do for myself. I think the rest of my life will be devoted to the journey of liking myself more.
ON the surface this may sounds selfish or conceited, however, what i have studied and come to understand is when we like ourselves (truly like ourselves) only can we truly like others. Only when we don’t judge and criticize ourselves will we be able to not criticize and judge others. I thought this wisdom was fascinating and I am learning to grasp how big of a task and service it is in life to get to know and like yourself.
I came to my favorite coffee shop in Kailua called Morning Brew and there was no one in line in front of me when I ordered my coffee and my Bacon Waffle (yes!) however, as soon as I sat down the line is literally out the door. This is why I love early mornings and I am happy to get to start to create my life schedule again to be an early riser for my yoga and meditation practice. I love the feeling of getting my day started before the world wakes up. To be honest in Washington it is so cold that I am always tempted to stay in bed as long as I can, and I was staying up too late also many times. I want to take this time here alone to reset my priorities and hopefully create some healthier habits. Our whole life is just a programed set up habits, we as Souls are soOooooooo much more than that, however, it is easy for us to think that our habits define us. My habit of staying up late and sleeping in isn’t who I am, it is just something that I got in a habit of doing. My habit of skipping yoga practice more than one day at a time, isn’t who I am, it is just a habit I got used to. I hope to discover the power of habits and share with anyone that cares, that we as humans are lucky because unlike a dog who will always be a dog……. we as humans have the ability (because of our frontal lobe of the brain) to be anything, do anything, accomplish anything, go anywhere we want. The only thing that stands in the way of change is our AWARENESS of our SOUL.
What makes you so happy that you get lost - you forget what day of the week it is or what time it is??? Do you love working in a hospital serving others, do you love being a mechanic, do you love taking walks in nature, or do you simply love growing plants or caring for something that brings you joy?
I am still learning and uncovering what makes me happy, at the moment stepping into the unknowns of life has been giving me joy. Being uncomfortable this past 6 months has made me more comfortable with myself and having new experiences always makes me feel alive and joy. I hope we can all continue to find joy in our lives and in our selves, by doing this we are of service to the world in bigger ways that we realize.
