From High Speed to Island Time
I finished my week on Oahu spending time with my good friend Zach. We have known each other for over a decade and started surfing together in our twenties. Now Zach comfortably surfs big waves on the North Shore and I like to go out on the small days to the breaks that are not as intense and he was so kind to take me around in my last two visits to the island to show me some really fun mellow spots. I had another great visit with Zach and I am so thankful that we continue to get to know each other again. I really enjoy our conversations about life, feelings, dreams, and visions.
On Monday after going to the post office in Waikiki to mail some packages to my family and friends back home, I got packed and headed to Honolulu airport to get ready for my journey to the Big Island. I took an afternoon flight to Hilo and chilled at the airport until my ride picked me up 2 hours later. After all of the overwhelming energy of Oahu, I was happy to sit and chill outside since the airport is all open air at the baggage claim.
As I write this, I have been here for five days and I have already had so many ups and downs. My emotions are on highs and lows, I have been having super intense dreams of things that I didn’t even know where in my subconscious. I dreamt last night of a place that I would visit when I was a child. It was the home of my aunt and cousins that lived not to far from me. When I would visit there, I remember that I would pee and poop in a jar or bucket because they did not have plumbing. We (my cousins and I) would walk to fetch water down the hill at the fresh water well that came out of the ground. WE would bring buckets of water back up the hill and to take bath or cook we would warm the water on the stove that was in their kitchen. I don’t remember anything else from there except that when it was cold or snowy outside we would use socks on our hands to keep them warm.
I am unsure of why things are coming up from my past in dreams, but I am most certain it is things that need to be released and healed. I am so grateful for this time to separate from the hustle and bustle of my life that i was living previously. I don’t have a car, I don’t have a bike, I have to hitch hike if I want to get anywhere. This is a place where we truly have to learn to slow down and we have to ask for help from others. I am happy to be learning about myself here. When we disconnect from the noise of everything else, we can finally hear our own heart and what it needs.
Living in a community with fifteen other people is challenging and rewarding all at the same time. The Navy was a great place to learn to live with others, but I feel because of the rank structure it is not a healthy way to learn to live and eventually someone is in charge and other people are subservient. I want to learn to live with others in harmony and see what each relationship can help me learn about myself. I am learning to be more compassionate here and I am also learning to be less aggressive in my interactions. We learn how to respect one another and our differences and our similarities. We are learning how to communicate in a respectful loving and non-violent way.
I am thankful for this experience thus far and from my first week I can say, I don’t think my life will ever be the same.
